I'm going to talk about polyamoury.

I don't mean the kind where one guy marries 16 of his cousins/neighbours, plants them all over town with 8 kids each and does a government leech act with each one. I don't mean swinging, or even open relationships.

I mean the kind where 3 or more people decide to have a dedicated relationship with each other. Poly, meaning Many, and amoury, meaning Love. Real love.

There are different kinds of polyamoury. Too many to list, as each situation is likely different; and the more people involved, the more complicated it can get. Let's assume 3 people are involved, for the sake of simplicity, and only two possibilities, both involving long term commitment. It can include homosexuality and/or bisexuality; or not.

There is the equal triad, where all parties love and relate to all other parties equally.

Or, one SO relates to both 'branches,' but the two branches don't relate to each other.
Now, to my point. Does anyone know of a relationship like this? Could you see yourself in a relationship like this? Do you consider this to be a marriage? Can you see it working along the trust lines? Do you think it's just sick and twisted? Tell me. I want to know. Here's what I think.
Does anyone know of a relationship like this?
Well, not personally. I know people who swing, and I know a couple who is looking for a third wheel to balance out their relationship - said couple also relates to me a lot about poly relationships they're aware of personally. Both cases I know through online circumstances.

Could you see yourself in a relationship like this?
In a word? Yes. In another? No. I have trouble with it some days, and other days it rocks my world. I was invited to be the third wheel of said party, and I almost agreed to it. Too many things interfered and I had to refuse (I still talk to them, you know. They are my closest, dearest friends). But, can you imagine how much love there must be between THREE people?? Especially to make it work, there would be a ton of love and understanding going on there. Plus, the idea of coming home to TWO sets of arms to hold me on a good or a bad day, to TWO loves, and to TWO best friends at the same time is, well, pleasing to greedy lil' me. But - jealousy, society and all around weird feelings continue to interfere with that idyllic sounding household. So I really don't know if I could do that or not. I seem to have a poly personality - I love so many different people, on different levels but also on the same levels, all at the same time. However, as in many things, the fantasy is quite different than the reality. I think it would be very difficult for me to partake in a polyamourous situation. However, I know there are many people who do, successfully.

Do you consider this to be a marriage?
Definitely. If the people involved wish it so. Personally, I wouldn't define it as a marriage, because it would be a unique situation and it should have a unique name if it has any at all. As far as legal benefits, etc, a committed relationship is a committed relationship, and I think, IMHO, that these types of relationships should have the same rights/benefits as couples. Of course, I think gay/lesbian couples should have the same rights/benefits as straight couples, and that doesn't happen either, does it? Sigh.

Can you see it working along the trust lines?
There would definitely need to be implicit trust involved on the sides of all parties. Communication, communication, communication. The key is the same as in a dual partnership, but multiplied in intensity.

Basically, I think love happens everywhere, in different degrees on a continuum, and who's to say how many people can participate in that love? Certainly not I.

Dating a zillion people at once without loving any of them is, of course, a different story.